Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

Username:
Password:
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever

Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?

[Mary]

Hi,

Similarly to Brian, I ‘don’t know what to say’.  So, my experience of the PJ was perhaps different, but just as moving.  At both the Sacred Sites the Love was there, but… subdued(?).  There was quiet, peace, calm.  No thought.  I wasn’t full, or empty.  I simply was.  This PJ was nice for me – not WOW or WHEEE, no major upheavals although stuff came up and one night there was a bout of fear.  Last year’s was like a holiday – going back to the freedom of a carefree, happy childhood.  This year’s was somewhat more mature, relaxed, more - shall we say - focused. 

I was tired in all bodies before beginning this Power Journey and am still feeling those effects.  So, much of the socializing that went on I missed in order to take care of PEM’s needs.  And yet some of the most memorable moments for me were connecting with others - spending time with my group leader, Ange and hanging out at the beach and sharing dinners with WillIAm and Julie….  O!  and the pool!  Melissa, did your dress survive?!

It will take me some time to deal with re-entry which has not been easy as it is combined with huge changes in my life.  Yes a new life in form and, not as easily grasped or conceptualized a new life in my inner world.  And as I bring this new inner world out I’m seeing changes that I like.  There is still more to release, process and bring to my outer world especially in the form of connecting to others.  So I’m starting out, stepping with confidence into this new, beautiful life.

Love and Light,
Mary

[Maqueila]

This Power Journey was wonderful and strange to me too because in a way I felt like I came out of it more scrambled than when I stepped into it.

It was wonderful because I have never ever enjoyed so much connection as I did this time and that changed my experience a lot. I made friends with new people and I finally made  friends with people I had known for some time and I enjoyed the closeness and doing things together more than I can say. It was good to be a guide again and care of my group and help turn it into a group, do and enjoy doing things together. Before going to Mexico I had a vision of doing yoga and my morning ritual by the sea and that vision came true. With my group's members we found a small deck at the beach that went into the water so we greeted the rising sun there doing yoga and then were often joined by Simon and Lyz and Amber for a morning ritual of tunning and aligning. It was joy for me to be able to share something I so enjoy with people I care about and to have them there with me. It brings out a desire to have a group of some kind - may be not a personal growth group initially but a group to help others to find some of Self, some peace, some joy, some direction in life. I would love to help other find more enjoyment in life and that may lead them to searching for more

At Tulum what I received as an energy to align to was a sense of freedom that I can do anything, that I am allowed to do anything. It felt empowering and so free, expansive - it felt wonderful and cut through the limitations I usually hold. Then we spent a day working on living from the laws of Self vs. from the rules of matter and that was a great experience for me because I got the essence of the difference between the two. I sensed what it would mean to live from the former and when I had applied that in my life. That gave me a new disire to have more of that, to walk the path Self wants me to walk without fear. There can be a great exhilaration in doing that, even if it may bring up fear.

At Coba my gift was personal power. I had a hard time before we started because my insecurity kicked in but when we were told to open our hearts I could open mine and received my gift. There were no doubts then. I had a harder time at one of the next processes we did where we had to allow dark threads of energy to be pulled out of us. It was hard for me to allow to open but some of the fear was released. Then we spoke to the Oracle and I have never ever felt such tenderness in their words before. There was so much love and confort in the energy present. They told me to not be afraid and that there was a place for me in this world. Then they stopped and looked into my eyes and they said "In fact there are two places and you know that, don't you? So don't be afraid". And yes, I knew because I knew as I know now that I have my place in Santa Fe too and I belong there. I have a family there. I was wondering why they said that but after a while I felt it. One of the exercises we did was to write checks for anything we may desire - our funds gradually grew to unlimited (and it was funny to see I could reach a place where I didn't know what I could spend my money for!). As I started writing I hit a wall - I couldn't decide about should I buy things like a kiln and a house in the country side to put it at here when I wanted to ultimately move to Santa Fe. Like should I build a life here or should I build it there and what I do with my life here while I am waiting to move there? Where is my place in this world? I see now that I can have both and I should not limit myself through trying to figure things out but I should follow my desires now and live my life as fully as I can now, build it as big as I can now. That will lead me to where I need to be

We were told to meet our future selves and I did meet mine and she was so vibrant with energy, so much in joy and in her power. And she felt so real and close to me. It was easy to connect to her and all I wanted was to merge with her. My One-ness and mentalness kicked in because when we were told to let go of our futures selves now I did even if it was hard to and I didn't want to. Or maybe I didn't because something surely stayed.

Then came the part when I got scrambled like one of those yogurts that look plain on the surface but on the bottom they have jam. Once you shook them the jam comes out. Except in my case that wasn't jam. Kris tried to make me see some things I need to change but my reaction to that was not as needed. Yesterday Kalyn and I talked about how to change that. I will write about what I need to work on clearing so I can be the woman I can be and am at my best in my thread.

What was so very touching for me was the last morning of the Journey when Kris channeled messages for some of the members of the group. There was so much love there, so much encouragement and tenderness. I keep saying tenderness and that is what it felt like. loving tenderness! I don't know if I have ever felt that on any other Power Journey before. This one was different in so many ways. And the parties we had! The FUN we had! But that is a story of its own!

Love & Light,

Makayla

[Karen]

Hello,

I will share my experiences of the PJ soon, but I wanted to post this experience I had today which directly relates to the blast-off opening of energy I had at Coba. I posted in my thread, but I feel this thread warrants this experience too.

I really, really opened.  I decided to do more processing today as I did not feel done. I want to share what happened.

I wanted to play! I took my blanket that I got at Coba (signficant for me), which Howard bartered and paid for (also significant...thank you Howard by the way) and decided to charge it. I asked for all unseen help to allow the energy of Coba to return, to come in and charge the blanket for me.

Ask and ye shall receive more than ye realizes.

I placed the blanket on the floor and sat in the sun centre.  A few days ago I was compelled to trace a certain pattern of steps in this part of my apartment when I was tuning into the energy at Coba. It feels like the energy is stronger and lighter in this place in my apartment now so I placed the blanket there.  I lit incense and held the  light crystal which Howard gave me in one hand and the dark crystal which Troy gave me in the other. 

I did not pass out thankfully. THIS time (thanks Kalyn for the grounding reminder) I really really really sunk deep into pb for a good while before moving onto eb and mb. I could feel myself lifting off out of my body and instead of becoming completely untethered I managed to go 'up' without completely leaving.  I felt heavy and light at the same time. I repeated the same process the Oracle had us do at Coba, which was opening heart chakra window and letting go...letting it all go.

I could feel the light crystal burning my left hand and the dark crystal cooling my right.  I cleared expectations with the releasing process and simply set my Intent to allow the energy to move as it needs to whether I can feel anything or not. Once I got to the place that Makayla describes as "don't push or pull..if it's there it's there if not it's not, just let it be!" Then WHOMP up I went into that space where I am unable to think at all. I felt a bunch of energies come through me all at once. I was observing all of this, but I really had nothing to do with it. It was doing things itself, I was just standing by being a vessel.

This next part is really hard to describe.

I shown without asking my light and dark.  I was taken to the dark. I was placed in the middle of pushing, pulling, wanting, grasping, anger, and lots of fear.  I could see it and feel it distantly but it did not pierce me.  It was like I was directly in the middle of my own very large ocean of parasite and I could feel my fear distantly, but I was unaffected at my core. I chose to connect on this unbiased core and watched as the energy from coba and elsewhere above slowly came in and began to transform parts of the dark.  Slowly as I watched things changing I realized how this was completely out of my control. I kept choosing the core for a while but the amount of energy that was inside me became scary for me - I then became lost in the dark and fear gripped me.  I fell out of the process.

I opened my eyes and saw 3 very tall awe-some, powerful, almost fiercesome shapes of light in front of me - they looked and felt all male.  They seemed tied to me and tied to Coba.  I have seen them before. One of them bent down on his knee and with long brown hair and piercing blue-brown eyes put his face close to mine and began speaking urgently.  I could not hear him, but I understood that he was wanting to help me.

I felt a little shaken.

I wanted to share this because I realize I will likely be having more of these experiences if I choose to allow.  I have lots of resistance and old belief systems towards energy and energy work ('oh you making it all up there is no such thing') from my conditioning and so by sharing this will break it.

After reading this over again I can see how much of Coba and Other Things which I know are there but cannot describe are really hovering closely around me quite excitedly waiting for me to move past my conditioning so I can begin to move into living the world of energy.   I do believe I may have met my guides for the first time.

I feel like a tiny minnow fish in the pacific ocean!

Love and light,
Karen

[Catalin]

Hi,

On the Journey you were given the gift of a new life - a beautiful, breath taking life. Tune into the sensation of it every day and live from that wonderful place.

That new life is now in this moment. Live in this moment, not the past. You may feel the past wanting to come back into your life. Don't let it. Just allow the past to pass through you as you focus on the now moment of your new exquisite life.

I choosed a different life and I felt it in Mexico. I started there because it started there. I choosed to be open and enjoy life. There is no place for old patterns. I let the new coming to my life and I choosed to fight the old. I choosed new friends, I let go the old ones. I have broken down the old links, the old connections with the old. I enjoyed to be with my surogate family. I also enjoyed to work with my stuff, it's never easy and sometimes the whole being seems wrapped in ego. Sometimes Self it is so dim when we come in form but I know that Self it is there and I have no doubts about it. It's what it ticks me. And I am willing to pursue Self. I am willing to open my feelings. I am also willing to protect my feelings, make them stronger. I am determined to be stronger. This is the best for a man. This is the best for me.
I choose to love and nobody can take that away from me any more. No ego or something else.

I loved Kris at the PJ, he came in so much power, I could see the place from where he was coming. He had the power to lift me up to the skyes. So much I enjoyed Kris. It means so much to me.

I am not perfect, sometimes I feel like I want to be that, but I am doing my best.

Love and Light, Cat

[Ange]

Two of my most enjoyable experiences at the Power Journey happened at Tulum and during our final class on Friday.

As I was passing out the tickets for each person to enter at Tulum, I opened and noticed that if I tried, I could see each person completely. Lyz was the one with whom it really got started. I was handing her her ticket, and as I opened to connect with her, I felt a kinship - a shared inner laughter at the antics of victim fragments and egos. And I laughed with joy seeing her and sharing the knowing that the love inside is so powerful and that it's healing light is unlimited and that it was what is real. Like a wonderful surprise that we both already knew was there.

After that, I opened and connected as best I could with each person, as they were. The best way I have to describe it is I could see the light and heart inside, and everyone was beautiful and individual.


Then, in the final class K2 had us as group leaders bless our M&M's and then give them to our groups with a blessing. Mary and Julie were in my group. As I gave them the blessing, I could see both of them very clearly. They were both beautiful and full of love. And I loved them so much. I felt so much joy to be in their presence and to totally be open with my love to them. Nothing else existed in that moment.

Love and Light,
Ange

[Ange]

Hi Ange:

I remember that!
I remember before Tulum, you hand me my ticket and we didn't speak, we just held each other and kissed our cheeks!

Thank you for sharing Ange!

Love and Light,

Sarita

 

[Ange]

I notice how easy it would be to go ahead and let the Power Journey go. It seems like it's been a while, and part of me would just move on and forget about it. But I think I'm going to keep posting little memories as they come up to re-connect with it as much as I can.

So, this next Power Journey experience came to mind for me to write about, and as I did, I re-connected with a charge in it to process.


I remember sitting in a big circle with Kalyn and all the rest of the ladies near the pool. When Kalyn brought up meeting with the ladies, it sounded fun. But when she started talking about connecting on a feminine level I remember having an intial reaction that I would rather go drink with the guys at the bar. The reaction was it felt like it would be too much - or maybe I wouldn't be "good enough" a female. (!) I also flashed to times I had tried to "be one of the guys", and of how that always comes back at me with my femininity being kind of "run over".

Kalyn passed out guardian angels - which was fun, and also some cloths she wasn't going to keep. Then by the time the clothes came out, I had aleady begun to feel at odds with being a female in general, and out of the loop knowing I wouldn't be able to wear anything she was giving away.

I did not feel at home with feminine connecting. Most especially in the large group. The ladies tended to talk a lot, and I did't have that same lively way of talking, and I just felt plain odd.

Kalyn mentioned how the feminine flow holds a space for men with the added emotional/inner world quality that men do not carry as much. And I told her that I had never stopped to consider that that particular quality was something women had to offer men, and that I tended to feel I didn't have anything to offer them. She suggested that I knew one reason this was true for me - I thought it was my wounding - which was up - but...she reminded me that I have a 60/40 flow with a stronger masculine flow than most women, and I myself needed other women to help me hold that space.

By the end of the meeting, I was feeling a hurt charge of just being worthless - particularly as a female, and as I struggled to not let it take me over, Kalyn said that I would need to clear some charges I had about being a female.

I wondered "Who on earth is going to ever want me? I'm too masculine, and I have nothing to offer that men need."

My mental body knew it was a charge, and I worked on releasing it. However - it came up very strongly today as I wrote! So I let it be and released it some more.

(And - it was up of it's own accord before I wrote, but subtle and not in my awareness. Maybe that's why this particular experience came up to write about.)


Love and Light,
Ange

[Karen]

Tulum

As we walked slowly on our way to the entrance point, I allowed myself to take in the energy as my leader Makayla suggested.  I felt a soft, warm, loving energy come up through my feet.  Although we were walking on hard road it was as though I was floating....I opened more and more and let it come up through my ankles and into my legs...

I felt such a strength and trust in Makayla as our group leader and I felt that our group was in a way coming home...the energy was distinctly soft and feminine.

As soon as I began to allow, I became so angry. I became charged, annoyed, I wanted to fight what was inside me.  I could feel part of me observing and perceiving nature...and another part of me was 'thinking', "How stupid is that? It's just a leaf or a tree...big hairy deal...grump grump grump"

I knew right away that I would be faced with a deep rejection which I have carried since I was born - my rejection of my femininity...I knew even before the first gate that I would have to choose to leave it behind. I allowed the anger to simmer and stew up inside me...I also kept my senses open enough to allow the energy to come in...in a way I was holding my light and my dark...softly we continued to walk and open...all of us warriors..

We stopped with the rest of the group, and as the sunlight hit Kris' face I saw the beauty of Tulum in his aura and stood in awe of the Power of this place...no anger or rejection that I had towards Self could ever match that. The Oracle spoke with a sweetness and stillness in her voice that pierced through my resistance and captured my attention.  They confirmed exactly what was going on inside of me...I knew then that what was happening inside me was exactly what was supposed to happen.

As we waited to pass through the gatekeepers, I felt such a sadness and grief over my own rejection.  Here I am, a child of this earth, a female, and I was taught that I was wrong the way I was...my entire life I tried so hard to be as much of a male as I could be...but it was never enough...and I could never be what was expected of me...anger and pain welled up inside me at how much of a punishment this was...this sadness and grief was more than I could bear.  I broke down at the gate and began sobbing...Makayla picked me up and held me tightly in her arms letting me cry and holding me up as the emotions were so powerful I felt paralyzed.  I felt painful cold, empty, alone, and rejected.

As we approached the first gate (for me it was kind of like my second...I had to choose to open on the walk there), I faced Troy, the gatekeeper, and he placed a warm, powerful loving hand over my heart chakra...this energy broke through my disconnect and opened up a portal inside me...a pathway for higher aspects of me to come down and connect with me...as our beautiful connection once was...

I remember at that moment wanting nothing more than to reconnect with those parts of me that were severed at such a young age...due to a powerful agreement made with my father and loss of connection with my mother...

As we walked 'between' the gates in the forest I could feel myself allowing a healing to occur..the rejection was there but Troy had repaired a connection that I had not been able to access since I was an infant.

I saw the next gate...the portal to the actual pyramids.  I was watching people pass through taking pictures...sensing that as I passed through I needed to let go of this hateful, repulsion that I had for my feminine divine Self...I did not consciously bear down to let go, but I was allowing and the magic of Tulum worked on me without my interference...this places are so powerful...one does not need to try merely to open and what you need is done to you whether you are aware or not...

As I opened my eyes to sacred grounds a brightness beyond the visible spectrum hit my vision and my chakras became bathed in beauty...this is so hard to describe...except that some of it is the beauty from within shining out to meet your own eyes...and most of it is captured in structures in the ground...like a big harness..

I followed my group with Ange's group and we sat down to do the releasing process, a much needed exercise for me.  I released over and over and over again...the sadness was still heavy inside me. Makayla suggested we go down to the ocean and let it wash away all our stuff... I felt as though I was 'missing out' on some intense process at first...but then I realized I was here with Makayla for a good reason..and I opened to her spontaneity and her 'let it go!' attitude.

We went down to the ocean and the beauty of Tulum's aqua waves crashing against the shore was exactly what I needed.  I felt the ocean and it felt me...I connected strongly to mother earth and felt such a joy and excitement at feeling powerful feminine energy...I gave my resistance to Tulum's ocean and let her take it...she knew...she was happy to have me back as child of the earth again...I felt the emptiness of No Thing...a relief!

The final process was to find the posture or feeling that we wanted to start our new lives with...the power, the love, the opportunity, and endless possibility that was within each of us...to align it to our tonal and begin our new life.

For me it was a feeling of complete openness, freedom, joy, and acceptance of who I was...I accepted my femininity.  I felt the urge to dance, to play, and to explore the wonders of life. As we finished our final process I opened my eyes and my vision was so much sharper and clearer than before...everything was so bright and crisp

Tulum had a powerful effect on healing fundamental parts of me that were broken...how could I hope to reconnect with my divinity when I have complete rejection of my natural gender flow? I broke the agreement made between me and my Higher Self...I am a woman and so feel freedom with me as I sing, laugh, dance, feel joy at being alive!

Love and light,
Karen